Warning: adult content.
As I type this, I am sitting in the University’s main library wondering if anyone can see the many tabs in my browser all with the word “porn” in their title. This is awkward. I spent at least half a day trying to find a post title that would not have people who caught you reading this not look at you the same way. Thank me later.
Many people have sat in this library, turned their screens away from potentially curious eyes and downloaded R rated movies, YouTube videos and explicit images online, to be watched later in the privacy of their rooms. With a boyfriend, with a group of friends, with a one night stand, by yourself. Everyone is doing it.
Okay so maybe not everyone is doing it but there is at least one man in South Africa that we all know about now. At the beginning of the week news broke about the Competition Commission boss who was busted for racking up a massive bill from viewing porn online. The story was reported here. Would you disagree with me if I said that there must have been at least half a dozen government officials who wiped the sweat off their brows and sighed in relief because it was not their porn habit that had been exposed? He is surely one of many people who goes out on extended business trips and watches that kind of stuff- on their iPads and laptops and smartphones – easy, ‘free’ and anonymous access.
When porn gets a hold of you, it holds on tightly. It is powerful. One of the reasons why it is powerful is because it is usually consumed in secret. For more on that, check out my post Dirty Little Secrets and Their Hidden Power. I know this from experience and from conversations had with close friends (mostly women, would you believe!). Very rarely does one come across porn intentionally, most just “stumble upon” it. You may have been channel surfing in the middle of the night, or walked in on someone watching it, or even been introduced to it in a school bathroom by your group of guffawing andcgiggling teenage friends.
And while some argue that porn is not all that bad and is even a legitimate alternative to promiscuous sex, can you deny that every time that you have consumed any kind of porn your conscience would not let you rest? In fact, part of the reason why people do it in secret is because ‘something’ in them tells them it is not right. The purpose of this first post on this topic is to ask you some questions about your views on porn, I’m going to address each of them later on, here they are:
What is porn exactly – is it the stuff I get embarrassed about when I’m sitting with my elderly parents or is it the hardcore stuff?
Is porn just ‘a guy thing’?
Is porn wrong in the moral sense?
Outside of the moral stuff, what is the effect of porn on an individual or society?
Is there such a thing is porn addiction and if there is, is it possible to get over it?
Over a number of posts I will be sharing some thoughts, resources and stories related to this topic. I know you will probably find it awkward but I would love for you to contribute to this conversation by sharing these posts and leaving comments (anonymously, if you prefer.) If you have any resources that you would like to direct me to, I would love your input!
I am really excited about this!
Thanks for reading.